The first thing he could remember was the dark, and how comfortable
he was there. Unseen hands massaged him, encouraging him to flex, to stretch
and bend, to move; and soft lulling voices whispered to him constantly,
telling him of so many things, history, mathematics, manners, religion,
literature, weaponry, morals, physics... he listened, coddled there in
the dark, and filed away each of the things they told him even as his hands
opened and closed.
Touch and pressure and constant quiet attention became his world, and
then he was decanted.
~~~~~~~~~~
At a little over one year old Rubedo was born, the oldest seven-year-old
in the world.
~~~~~~~~~~
They took away the dark, the touch, and the quiet voices, and replaced
them with bright and noise and test after test after test. Once he discovered
how to make his mouth make sounds, using the words he knew was easy enough,
and he was talking regularly after the third day; walking did not take
much longer, despite having never supported his own weight before.
But seeing: he did not like to see. The scientists congratulated each
other on his vision, and how acute it was, but all that he knew was that
it was bright, and it made his head hurt. But when they could be bothered
to stop talking to each other about him and talk to him, instead, they
assured him that he would get used to it. He did not tell them that this
was not comforting.
And hearing: he missed the quiet voices that spoke to him. The voices
that he heard now were talking around him, over him, about him, but almost
never to him; he missed the attention desperately and like any seven-year-old
he did what he thought was necessary to reclaim the attention. But the
scientists simply silently replaced the broken furniture and painted over
the marked-up wall, and Rubedo eventually gave up.
~~~~~~~~~~
Then tutors came, to teach him how to run and hide and fight and shoot,
and he had attention again, although he did not like to be shouted at.
He shot one tutor for shouting at him. Nothing was ever said, and the man
did not come again. Rubedo was left to discipline himself for the act.
He did so, and felt less guilty thereafter.
~~~~~~~~~~
They still spoke over him, around him, as if he could not understand
them, and from what they said Rubedo judged they deemed him a success.
He was smart, and fast, and a technically brilliant warrior both on foot
and in an AGWS, and yet charming and attractive. A success, then.
He was poked and prodded and put through his paces by a different group
of scientists, while a group of men in very expensive suits watched. The
men in suits went away, and the scientists received more funding.
There were to be others.
~~~~~~~~~~
Empathic, the scientists said while clustered around a
tube full of nutrient liquid and a slim white figure floating in the center.
A spy. This one will be able to understand people, and read their
thoughts on their skin, and charm and manipulate them.
~~~~~~~~~~
When the disembodied voice first spoke to him, soft and low and lulling,
Rubedo was engaged in reassembling a cleaned and oiled machine pistol,
down in the steel-walled armory.
The touch of the voice, so old and familiar, brought a small and faraway
smile to his face. He did not know that he smiled.
It became easier to imagine himself back in the tank of his birth if
he closed his eyes, so he did so; his hands, unwatched, unmonitored, continued
to open and close, reassembling the pistol. And the voice spoke, sharing
bits of information which Rubedo silently filed away, and asking questions
which Rubedo did not answer, assuming that as always the voices would answer
them in time.
It had always been his place to listen, so listen he did, intent upon
the attention which he had unexpectedly been shown, a habit older than
he.
The voice shortly faltered and fell silent, and in the armory Rubedo's
brow creased.
The voices in the tank had been simply that, voices; but in the void
left by this one there came the fleeting sense of betrayal, poured into
Rubedo's mind like honey.
~~~~~~~~~~
And then he returned to his quarters and they introduced him to himself,
white-haired and with new distrust burning in his eyes. And Albedo, his
pale twin, looked at him in silence.
was it you i heard? Rubedo thought to himself. And even
though he had not spoken aloud, the answer came back, sullen and quiet:
yes.
Rubedo closed his eyes and silently offered his apology, for he knew
that he had offended his brother.
Years later Rubedo would look back and remember that Albedo had never
accepted the apology, although they quickly became close, the only two
quicksilver sprites in a forest of dull and plodding golems.
Often they slept curled up together, sharing thoughts and dreams. Neither
of them could get enough of the mindspeech, for they both missed the quiet
attention of the tanks; together they dreamed up fantastic worlds and then
tore them down again, merely to have something to share.
~~~~~~~~~~
Albedo grew quickly. He was, perhaps, never as strong as Rubedo, but
he was indeed empathic, and he taught Rubedo more things about manipulation
and coercion than Rubedo, perhaps, needed to know.
~~~~~~~~~~
When Rubedo and Albedo were informed that another like them was to be
made, Rubedo determined not to make the same mistake again.
~~~~~~~~~~
Strong, the scientists said this time, clustered around
the tube. He will be strong and fast and deadly, and yet pliable,
and he will accept orders unquestioningly.
~~~~~~~~~~
When this brother was due to be born, with hair yellow like the sun,
Rubedo felt the faltering touch of his mind for the first time and leapt
to answer.
He threw himself open, drawing in his new brother with all his strength
and will, pouring the vast wealth of his experience into his brother's
cringing mind, flooding the newborn with love and emotion, giving it everything
he could so that it would not begin its life alone, as Albedo did.
~~~~~~~~~~
His new brother died screaming in a puddle of nutrient fluid less than
a minute after it was decanted.
~~~~~~~~~~
The scientists were dismayed, and flocked in great droves of white-coated
forms to study the dead one, speaking in hushed and detached tones as it
was disassembled. Its body yielded them no secrets, and only its two brothers
knew why it had not lived.
Rubedo never breathed a word, save to Albedo, from whom he could hide
nothing.
Together they dealt with his horror as best they could, and if the
knowledge drove them a little further apart, well, so be it.
~~~~~~~~~~
The scientists decided to try again. Despite his terror at his two mistakes,
Rubedo decided on a plan of action.
~~~~~~~~~~
Genius, the scientists said this time, staring at the pale
figure floating in a net of tubes and wires. He will be smarter than
any human has ever been. He will retain information forever. Tactics and
the odds will be his playgrounds. He will be able to gather facts and make
decisions in the blink of an eye.
~~~~~~~~~~
When he felt the first faltering touch of this brother's mind, Rubedo
did not leap for it. Instead he sent a single thought, the line thin and
soft: can you hear me? you must answer; do not simply listen. i am
not like the other voices. can you hear me?
Yes, affirmed the other, uncertainly. then what
are you?
Rubedo took a deep breath and threw his mind open, but made no move
to draw his brother in. Instead, he waited. come to me, he
sent, when you're ready, and you shall find out.
~~~~~~~~~~
Five minutes later, thrashing and bleeding from the nose on the floor
of his room, Rubedo finally understood why the unnamed one had died.
~~~~~~~~~~
The first touch of his brother's mind was soft, and tentative, searching
for limits and discovering none.
Then Rubedo fell, like a pebble that has been tossed into a howling
vortex, as his brother devoured him, taking everything Rubedo was and knew
and thought for his own. Everything that was Rubedo fit into a small corner
of his new brother's mind, and still the desperate need for information
tore at him, as his brother begged him for more, more to know, more to
understand...
It took all of Rubedo's remaining strength simply to scream stop!
across their connection. But stop his brother did, uncertainly, closing
in on himself like a dying flower. And Rubedo, though it took time and
effort, was able to reassemble the bits of himself that he remembered,
and they knew each other.
As equals, then, they clung to each other, and Rubedo's inner voice
was imperative. you must not let them know how smart you are! they
must not find out! pretend to be no smarter than i am. you must.
And his brother looked at all that was Rubedo, saw all that had passed
before and those things which Rubedo believed to be true, and he understood.
i will do so.
~~~~~~~~~~
The scientists were disappointed. Nigredo, despite their high hopes,
was only slightly more intelligent than Rubedo, for all that he was also
agile, and strong, and charming in his own dark way. They released him
into the care of his brothers, and now they were three.
And now Rubedo had the first true weapon in his arsenal.
~~~~~~~~~~
In his mind Rubedo introduced Albedo to Nigredo. The struggle was brief,
and furious, as empathic mastery warred with an intellect large enough
to encompass it; they came out of the struggle bonded fastly to each other,
and in this way was Rubedo reconciled with Albedo, through the dark conduit
of their younger brother, whom they both loved.
They did not speak, often. The mindspeech was more satisfying and could
not be eavesdropped upon, and they spent many hours curled up together,
red, white, and black, taking comfort from the touch of mind and body alike.
And if Rubedo built worlds and Albedo tore them down, then Nigredo populated
them, making the exercise complete.
~~~~~~~~~~
Nigredo devoured clandestine information as quickly as he could get
it, in his desperation often outstripping their attempts to provide it.
Finally Albedo charmed a small UMN device from one of their guards, and
Nigredo could not be parted from it thereafter, until it burned out six
months later.
He consumed fiction with the same intensity as non-fiction. When asked
why, he told them, fiction authors are devious; they scheme things
instead of just reporting them. i wish to be devious, too.
~~~~~~~~~~
The scientists came under some pressure to produce results beyond the
existence of three small children who might or might not be the perfect
warriors, and in truth, after the failures of the third and fourth children,
they were no longer so interested in creation and study. Thus they turned
their attention to the ideals of mass production and profit, instead.
They came to Rubedo and Albedo and Nigredo while they slept and came
away with cell samples, drawn from beneath their skins.
In this way did the three of them become fathers to the masses of URTVs
that came afterwards.
~~~~~~~~~~
The new children were strong, and fast, and excellent warriors, yet
also dull-witted and unable to think for themselves very well; their green
hair ensured that they would never be mistaken for human. And they were
divided into three platoons, and Rubedo and Albedo and Nigredo were set
over them, and Rubedo was set over them all.
The hum and babble of their mental voices was never more than the singing
of cicadas in the powerful conduit that was Rubedo's mind. Over this hum
Rubedo and Albedo and Nigredo spoke to one another in celestial tones that
their children could not understand.
And the scientists lost interest in them as subjects and gained interest
in them only as profit.
And in this way did they gain a certain measure of freedom.
~~~~~~~~~~
They were rented out to a miniscule colony world, all several thousand
of them, and made to defend the world against the depredations of pirates.
This was required, to produce the results that the men in very expensive
suits wished to misconstrue.
The reality of their existence was a nightmare to them, so loud where
there had previously been quiet, so violent where it had previously been
calm; they each killed for the first time, and all three earned scars here
and there. And for the first time Rubedo felt a true death in his mind,
as one of the green-haired children died screaming in flames, and it required
all that his brothers could do to calm and restrain him.
By the time they returned he was accustomed to the sensation.
~~~~~~~~~~
When they were all ten--when Rubedo was four, and Albedo was three,
and Nigredo was one--they returned to the long low buildings in which they
had been born, and they began to plot their escape. With the fervor of
his desire carefully restrained to avoid scorching the minds of his brothers,
Rubedo explained the daring plan that he had been refining for so many
years, ever since his birth.
When he was done, Albedo thought nothing, simply radiated his desire
to leave at any cost. But Nigredo was silent, and when he was prodded explained
his reservations with Rubedo's plan at some length.
With his plan in ruins about his feet, Rubedo challenged Nigredo to
come up with a better.
i will, thought Nigredo. And a moment later, i have.
He explained his plan, and what he would require, and even though stung,
Rubedo could not deny that it had included many things that his had not.
~~~~~~~~~~
It was Rubedo who stole and cached the things Nigredo would require:
food from the kitchens, water in bottles, certain medications from the
hospital, tools, wax, and solder from the electrician's closet, and black
shoe polish from their combat kit. It was Rubedo who convinced the scientists
that a period of rest was required for all the URTV, one in which they
could relax and heal without interference.
It was Albedo who first found the abandoned UMN terminal, hidden in
a tiny dust-covered niche in a barracks that lay mostly unused. It was
Albedo who scoured the ranks of their children and found two willing and
able to help them accomplish their plan, two who were slightly brighter
than their brothers.
It was Nigredo who carefully rerouted certain surveillance devices
and modified others. It was Nigredo who made clever alterations to the
power grid, so that a certain amount of power use might go without drawing
notice.
~~~~~~~~~~
On a certain morning a URTV reported to the infirmary, complaining to
the check-in computer of stomach pains. He held his palm up to the sensor
and allowed it to be scanned, and he was admitted to the hospital.
The door to the wards opened, but he did not enter. Instead he waited
until the doors closed and the computer reset; then he spoke again, complaining
to the computer of migraine. The palm that he held up to the sensor this
time was cold, and hard, and made of rehardened solder, and bore the black-painted
mark of one of his brothers.
He was admitted to the infirmary a second time, and this time, he entered
when the door opened.
~~~~~~~~~~
A second URTV, his green hair darkened to black with shoe polish, lay
curled up with Albedo and Rubedo in their quarters. Bits of wax still lingered
under his fingernails, and he kept his eyes half-closed to disguise the
fact that they were the wrong color.
Rubedo and Albedo petted his small and nervous mind as if it were a
cat, and eventually he slept, calm under the surveillance cameras.
Red, white, and black, they lay together. On the second day, prompted,
the false Nigredo began to show signs of illness that he did not feel.
~~~~~~~~~~
And Nigredo, temporarily free, sat at the UMN terminal, eyes fixed on
the screen, fingers flying over the keyboard.
~~~~~~~~~~
Rubedo and Albedo could only steal tiny moments with him, since to be
gone too long was to alert their minders. But Nigredo barely noticed them,
too intent on the screen and too aware of the time limit that he was working
under to stop. His mind was closed to them; though this pained all three
of them, it had to be so.
Despite his plan he did not pause to feed himself. He swallowed wake-up
pills with sips of water and then left the water to grow warm and unpalatable
beside him.
Once Rubedo broke a ration bar into tiny pieces and held them to Nigredo's
lips, and these bits he did eat, nipping them from Rubedo's fingers without
taking his eyes from the screen.
Once Albedo sat at Nigredo's feet and rested his forehead against his
brother's thigh, silently imploring him to rest, or to eat. This Nigredo
ignored.
But mostly they would simply watch Nigredo's fingers fly over the keys,
almost too fast to be seen. Or they would watch the screen, watch as Nigredo
slipped his hand into the coffers of a thousand immense corporations and
pulled it out dripping with money, while the guard dogs slept on unawares;
as Nigredo erased his tracks, leaving lead in place of gold and sweeping
away his footprints; as Nigredo slipped his hand into a thousand different
banks and pulled it out empty, leaving behind only accounts of negligible
size registered to people who did not exist; as Nigredo surrounded these
accounts with banks of fog and guard dogs of his own, then vanished into
the shadows from which he had come.
And Nigredo would stop, and rub his eyes, and take another pill, and
then return to his thefts, the circles under his eyes as dark as his hair.
And Rubedo or Albedo would stare at Nigredo for a moment, and then
slip away, before they were missed.
~~~~~~~~~~
Three days he gave himself. Three days he had.
He grew gaunt and bruised and ill, and yet he did not stop, plunging
into his thousandth theft as if it were his first. Curled up with the false
Nigredo Rubedo and Albedo worried over him.
And on the third day he stopped, and wiped every last trace of himself
from the console both inside and out, and attempted to stand, instead collapsing
at Rubedo's feet in delirium.
i've done it, he thought as his brothers carried him to
the infirmary. now we wait.
~~~~~~~~~~
Two URTVs returned to their squads the next day, no longer ill.
Nigredo remained in the infirmary for three more days.
~~~~~~~~~~
four years, thought Nigredo, the day he was released. there
is a place where will will be considered adults at fourteen, no matter
how old we really are. we shall sue for freedom for all of us.
must we wait so long? Albedo thought, his hand straying
to Nigredo's arm again.
it's forever, added Rubedo, pressing his forehead to Nigredo's
shoulder.
i know, Nigredo thought, closing his eyes. but we
must be patient. it is only four years.
~~~~~~~~~~
But it was only two years later that they were sent to Miltia.
~~~~~~~~~~
Rubedo opened his eyes to a low and filthy concrete ceiling and coughed,
a grunting rasping sound. The back of his throat was dry, and his limbs
were heavy and sore.
In response to the cough there was a flurry of noise from nearby, and
soon a gaunt apparition came into view, staring down at Rubedo with wide
and shocked eyes. Nigredo blinked once, and then burst into tears.
Confused, Rubedo attempted to send calming thoughts. There came no
answer; indeed, the inside of his head was completely silent. He could
not remember why, but it frightened him.
Wiping his eyes, Nigredo threw himself into the nest of rags with Rubedo
and curled tightly about him, as they had been accustomed to do. And together,
whispering aloud although it pained and restricted them both, they reconstructed
as much as they could.
~~~~~~~~~~
This was how Rubedo discovered that he had been unconscious for close
to six months.
~~~~~~~~~~
How he had survived when Rubedo thought him dead, Nigredo did not know.
How he had managed to get the two of them off Second Miltia, Nigredo
did not say.
They were twelve; Rubedo was five and Nigredo was two. They were hidden
in the boiler room of a condemned office building on a dying colony world,
and they were alone. For six months Nigredo had kept them alive by searching
for odd jobs, any little chore that might earn him enough to feed them
both. They were both gaunt and weak; sometimes he had failed.
Water came from a rusty hand pump behind the boiler, and that, at least,
was free.
~~~~~~~~~~
Their money was lost to them; this world had few UMN terminals, and
those that were available to them were too old and slow and compromised
to be of any real use. They were, perhaps, the richest paupers in the universe,
but the irony failed to feed them.
~~~~~~~~~~
For a month Rubedo worked to get himself back into shape, scouring the
condemned building for those scraps of metal that were saleable while Nigredo
swept floors and ran errands.
When Rubedo was once again strong, they adjusted. It was now Rubedo
who went out every day to seek work, and Nigredo went instead to the library,
hiding himself behind a corner terminal and hoping not to be bothered.
It was unlikely, he explained, that a lawyer could be found to take on
their case, at first, as they would be dismissed as tale-spinning children
or shunned as harbingers of corporate fury. It was Nigredo who would be
their representative.
The books of law were tucked into his mind, one after the other, where
they would stay for the rest of his life.
It did not seem to be that difficult, the law.
~~~~~~~~~~
They were lonely, despite their increasingly desperate physical contact;
especially so for Nigredo, who had never been alone in his mind before.
For six months they struggled to survive, holding each other tightly in
the night to substitute for the easy mental contact of their early lives.
And though neither would admit it, both of them strained their minds
towards each other regularly, attempting to regain contact. These attempts
were invariably unsuccessful, leaving them short-tempered and upset.
It was not until six months later that Rubedo sat bolt upright in the
night, screaming. Nigredo fell back, arms automatically protecting his
head. i thought i felt you reaching out to me in your sleep and i
tried to answer, Nigredo thought, without much hope. can you...
can you hear me?
Silence, as cold as ever. Then i can hear you, came the
answer, weak and distant. i can hear you!
And they both wept in the dark, clinging to each other and attempting
to widen the tiny bridge they had built across the nothing between them.
~~~~~~~~~~
Rebuilding their mental link to its old strength took longer than they
expected, but it was a task they undertook with something like joy.
Even after they were once again linked, they were the only two residents
of their world. There were no children to hum and buzz under them, and
no Albedo to destroy the worlds they had created.
But they had each other, and that was enough for them, used to privation
as they were now.
~~~~~~~~~~
A month after that they first noticed that Nigredo had grown taller
than Rubedo.
~~~~~~~~~~
Nigredo's body continued to change, slowly at first and then faster,
elongating, changing, becoming clumsy and ill-proportioned, scrawny where
he had once been perfect.
Rubedo remained exactly the same.
Soon they ceased sleeping in the same bed: physical contact was rapidly
becoming disturbing as Nigredo grew towards adulthood and Rubedo did not.
Later they ceased being in constant contact: Nigredo's mind was changing
even as his body was, and there were things therein that neither of them
wished to share.
As children they were always at heart the same; now they had secrets
from each other. Now they began to differentiate themselves one from the
other, as Nigredo became an adolescent and Rubedo remained a child.
~~~~~~~~~~
Somewhere out there Albedo was also elongating like a shadow before
the sinking sun; somewhere out there those few of their children that yet
lived were doing the same.
This they both knew; this they never spoke of.
~~~~~~~~~~
Nigredo studied the law. Nigredo struggled with this new version of
himself. Nigredo fretted in the night about Rubedo's unchanging nature.
Rubedo brought in what money he could. Rubedo struggled with his fear
and curiosity about the man that Nigredo was becoming. Rubedo fretted in
the night about his childishness.
And eventually, they turned fourteen; Rubedo was seven, and Nigredo
was four.
~~~~~~~~~~
we must get to fifth jerusalem, Nigredo thought, as they
reached out across the gap between their bedding to clasp hands. there
is a ship...
Rubedo frowned. can we afford passage?
... no.
~~~~~~~~~~
Every bit of their money went towards feeding themselves; every attempt
to save had ended poorly, with a need for medicine, or small objects, or
simply for food when small jobs were scarce.
The tickets to Fifth Jerusalem were several hundred gold each, more
money than either of them had ever held before, although they owned a hundred
thousand times that, in theory.
~~~~~~~~~~
i will find the money, thought Rubedo.
how?
i don't know yet. but i will. And Rubedo vanished into
the darkness of just before dawn, his feet silent on the cracked concrete.
~~~~~~~~~~
Nigredo waited all that day and night, turning pages of his precious
law books in his mind, and clawing himself with worry.
Every hour he would call to Rubedo, demanding nothing but contact.
But Rubedo refused him even this, slipping through Nigredo's mental fingers
as if he did not exist.
~~~~~~~~~~
It was close to the next dawn when Rubedo returned, drawn and pale,
his clothing rumpled and torn. But he bore a battered cash card in his
hand, a card with no name stamp, a card bearing almost a thousand gold.
He fell onto his rags without a word and curled up tightly, falling
into a sleep as dark as death, the cash card clutched to his chest with
both hands. Nigredo regarded him for a long, silent moment, then draped
his own jacket over his brother. sleep well.
And, a moment after, I swear that I will never require anything
like this from you again.
~~~~~~~~~~
Nigredo never asked how Rubedo got the money, and Rubedo, for his part,
was ever unwilling to say.
~~~~~~~~~~
is there enough?
there is enough.
are you ready? do you know the law?
I am. I do. do you understand what I require of you?
yes. i do.
good.
soon?
immediately.
~~~~~~~~~~
So it was that two boys, one gangly with adolescence and one cherubic,
appeared at the ticket window to purchase two tickets on the Perihelion.
"We were visiting our aunt by ourselves," Nigredo assured the ticket
taker, naming a name that she found familiar. Rubedo simply smiled, an
artless expression that he had carefully perfected in a cracked piece of
mirror. "Our parents are waiting for us at home." And the ticket taker
smiled and nodded, reassured by the boy's charming dark maturity and the
innocent beauty of his brother. The boys' worn but clean clothing was nothing
unusual, on this dying colony world.
Two tickets were produced, and Nigredo tucked them carefully inside
his jacket, over his heart. "Take care of your little brother!" the ticket
taker called after them.
"Yes, ma'am," they said in unison, Nigredo out loud and Rubedo under
his breath. "I will." |