Tales From The Wyvern Westward: You Say Tomato, I Say Tomahto
This is really just a small, disembodied snippet of conversation. It contains references to Xenogears and to Final Fantasy 9, although there are almost no serious spoilers.
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(SCENE: The main room at the Wyvern Westward. BART is here, slumped over a table, snoring.)
(MARGIE enters the bar and crosses to BART.)

MARGIE: Bart! Bart, come on, wake up, we gotta go!

(BART wakes, slowly.)

BART: Guh? Wha? Marcy?

MARGIE: Um... did you say 'Margie'?

BART: Um. Yeah. Yeah. Hi, Margie. What's up?

MARGIE: Sigurd needs you back at the Yggdrasil, and... EEEEK! Bart! What happened to your eyepatch?

BART: Huh?

(BART reaches up and gropes his face.)

MARGIE: Eww... um... I'll be outside, okay, Bart?

(MARGIE rushes out, looking definitely ill. BART searches the area around his table, not finding anything.)

BART: Hey! Has anyone seen my eyepatch?

SEVERAL VOICES: Ewwwww...

BART: Look, I'm sorry! Just give me back my eyepatch and you don't have to look at it any more! Where is it?

SOMEONE: I think Kuja took it.

BART: ... why the hell does he need my eyepatch? It'd just cover up his eyeshadow... hey, Kuja!

KUJA: What?... I hope you know that that looks really disgusting.

BART: Uh... do you have my eyepatch?

KUJA: Yes.

BART: Well, give it back! What do you need it for anyway?

KUJA: Pants.

BART: ... uh?

(BART stares at KUJA for a moment.)

BART: Uh. I don't think I'll need that back after all... 'scuse me.

(BART puts his hand over his face and rushes out the door, looking definitely ill.)

(CURTAIN.)


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COMMENTS: Kuja's outfit puts me in mind of Vagrant Story... it's a nice skimpy outfit he's almost wearing, isn't it?

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